Tag Archives: daughter

44 Things I Want My Daughters To Know

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There are so many things I want to teach my girls that my mind threatens to explode. Half of it they are far too young to even understand yet but the life lessons I want them to learn are always front of mind for me. Some are simple wee tokens of advice that have served me well, others are bigger lessons that I need them to understand. I know I can’t save them broken hearts or hard lessons but when the time is right I will pass on my pearls of wisdom.

Things I want to teach my daughters

  1. Always make eye contact when speaking with someone. It is respectful and good manners.
  2. Live to eat. Food is delicious and there is so much to enjoy and discover. Don’t eat just to live.
  3. Never judge people. You don’t know their story and you haven’t walked in their shoes.
  4. Learn to say NO. You don’t need any reason except that you want to say no.
  5. Read books. Lots of books.
  6. Don’t take life or yourself too seriously.
  7. Tattoos are permanent. Think it through, trust me.
  8. Don’t settle in a relationship. You deserve a prince who captures your heart and protects it as if it were made of glass. Wait for that man.
  9. No matter how old or young you are, if you are drunk, ring me. Do not drive. Do not get in some ones car. I will not be mad at you and I will get out of bed for you.
  10. Don’t sleep around. Just don’t.
  11. It’s not the quantity that matters when it comes friends. It’s the quality.
  12. Don’t be afraid to do you. Be proud of who you are and be you with confidence.
  13. A naked face can be liberating. Don’t be afraid to show it.
  14. Always have wine in your fridge. For when I visit.
  15. Buy the shoes, the handbag, the perfume – you deserve them.
  16. Be a good listener. Really hear people when they talk to you.
  17. People always remember how you make them feel. Make them smile.
  18. No one is any better than you, and you are no better than anyone else.
  19. We are all in this together, be kind.
  20. Take responsibility for your mistakes. Apologise when you should.
  21. Don’t be afraid to fail. Take a deep breath and try.
  22. You can be and do anything you want to.
  23. You can also do absolutely nothing all day except eat chocolate and watch tv. That’s ok too but only every now and again.
  24. If you’re not married to him, use protection. Safety first.
  25. Just because it zips, doesn’t mean it fits.
  26. Wine/beer and pizza is a perfectly acceptable meal.
  27. Tights are not pants and you are better than track pants. Unless it’s Lazy Sunday and then anything goes.
  28. I don’t care if you choose to love women or men. You are still you and dad and I will always love you.
  29. If they make you cry, they aren’t worth your tears.
  30. Have the courage and strength to walk away. Sometimes things aren’t right for us and we must accept this.
  31. Childbirth is painful. Few things are comparable. Except bikini waxing, that’s kinda the same.
  32. Always have something you do just for you.
  33. Your youth will fade, so may your looks but your mind is forever. Keep it sharp.
  34. Never lose your sense of humour.
  35. If you have to, try the weed but stay away from the hard stuff.
  36. See the world. Go on adventures.
  37. Stay at school. Go to university. Education is your weapon.
  38. Never go to bed angry.
  39. We need the cloudy days to appreciate the sunshine.
  40. When nothing seems to be going right, turn the music up loud and dance that shit out.
  41. I am always on your side. I’ve got your back.
  42. Even if I am not here, I am always with you.
  43. Everything will be ok in the end.
  44. Something as simple as your breath, your smile, your laugh – completes me. To me you are everything.

Mel x

A Letter To My Daughter Turning Five

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Trilly Bug : My Crazy Bug : My Baby Bug.

I remember Miss’s first day at school. I fought back tears as she entered school full of excitement. I went to the car when the 9am bell rang and cried like a baby. I watched the clock, counting down the hours until pick up time and then sat out the front of school from 2.40pm just waiting.

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Teeny tiny beginnings.

Trilly starts school next Friday and the feelings are back. Just this morning I fought back tears as I organised to bring her a birthday cake on her last day at kindy, her actual 5th birthday. However, this time I won’t let Trilly see me sad, I won’t let her realise how hard it is for me because she is excited and she deserves me to be excited for her.

It’s not about her leaving me and not having her by my side every afternoon. It’s bigger than that. It’s the realisation that she is moving on to that next step. That step that involves me having to start letting go. She is no long my baby, we are passed that now. She is becoming my independent young child. So a letter for her memory box is a birthday must.

The fight for freedom and independence started young with this one.
The fight for freedom and independence started young with this one.

Dear Trilly,

Next week you are FIVE! That is a big milestone in my mummy book. It is the start of a whole new chapter in both our lives. Me, the mother of two big school girls and you, the new big schoolgirl. A new exciting step for all of us.

I am so proud of you. Your eagerness to learn and your fierce strive for independence. Your cheeky personality and sense of humour already apparent. You are so tough, yet so gentle and kind. I have heard you stand up to other children your age as they are overly assertive with you and you do it with kindness that I don’t think I could have ever taught you. It is natural to you to assert yourself but to do it kindly.

You were once so shy, painfully shy. Uncle Hayden once babysat you for the night and you cried for so long when we left that you fell asleep on the kitchen floor. He left you for fear you’d wake up and cry again. You have grown so much and now I see you rush at kindy to sign up for saying the prayer.

Nope, she never needs help. Not even when putting on her googles.
Nope, she never needs help. Not even when putting on her googles.

Ever since you discovered you could hold a cup yourself your quest for independence has been strong. You toilet trained at 15months because you refused to let me put a nappy on you and you couldn’t figure out how to do it yourself, so knickers and the toilet were your only option. You are always wanting to help me with everything and when I say no you reply ’but how will I learn?’

You are fearless. Sometimes this worries me as you sprint towards the ocean or go full accelerator on your motorbike. You are going to learn some tough lessons about the importance of caution but these are your lessons to learn and until I am ready for you to learn them I will continue to do my best to protect you. I can’t help it, it’s my job.

I want you to remember to treat everyone as you would like to be treated. This is my biggest wish. The world needs more kindness and I know you can be it. As you go through school you will encounter some mean people, it’s inevitable but kill them with kindness. They are the ones that need it most.

She crawled at 8months but didn't walk until 14months, and then she just ran.
She crawled at 8months but didn’t walk until 14months, and then she just ran.

I cannot wait to cheer you on at school cross country, athletics days and swimming sports. I cannot wait to see both my girls on stage for the school productions and to sit proudly at prize-giving’s for you both. I can’t believe how quick our early years have flown past but I am excited for the next part of our lives.

Love always and forever,

Mum x

A contagious smile
A contagious smile

Ps. In about a month’s time you are going to tell me you hate school that you don’t want to go and it’s dumb. So before we get there let’s make something clear, this is you for ATLEAST the next 10 years, I will most likely enforce that you stay at school for the next 12years. So get used to it. Suck it up Princess. You and your sister can commiserate together now. School is your future and you need it.

A Letter to My 8yr Old Daughter On Her Birthday

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To my Darling Miss,

Tomorrow you turn 8 years old and I truly can’t believe how fast those 8 years have gone. I think back to our first days together and remember that you slept a lot and I watched a lot. I would stare at you for hours trying to figure out what I was supposed to do and how we were going to have to learn together. You had this soft fuzz of dark hair, wrinkled tiny hands and the smallest feet I had ever seen. I held your tiny body terrified I’d break you. From the moment you came into this world and looked into your father’s eyes you became the apple of them. Our hearts never knew a love like this could exist until you showed us.

Back then I could never have imagined the young girl my tiny baby would grow into. You have surprised me at every step and we continue to learn and grow together. You are so like me and yet so much unlike me at the same time. Our differences continue to teach me and help me grow as your Mother. I know some times we disagree and you get upset with me, I hate to disappoint you but I am still learning too.

You wear your heart on your sleeve and it is one of the biggest and kindest hearts I have ever known. You see the best in everything and believe the good in all. The world is going to knock you around, the day you realise there is unkindness and cruelty within it will break my heart. I want to keep you in that bubble of yours forever but when the inevitable happens, I will be there. I will pick you up and I will help heal your heart.

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There will also be times when I will not be enough. When no matter how much I want to fix things, I won’t be able to. You will be ok. You will survive. You are stronger than you think. Though your heart is tender you have an iron will and a soul of determination. I remember when you started school at only 5 years old and you were cruelly bullied. I remember the days you cried and I wiped away your tears but I also remember the day you told me that it was ok because the bully just needed a friend. If you could kill with kindness then my darling girl you did.

Your magical imagination keeps the magic within me alive. When I ask you what you are going to be when you grow up, you firmly answer ‘A mermaid’. I love this about you and I especially love that you share this magic with your younger sister. I don’t think she could have requested a better big sister. You nurture her, you play tricks on her, you laugh with her and you tease her. She hurt her knee on the driveway last week and you picked her up and carried her all the way back to the house. I pray that the two of you are always this close. She is your only sister and you hers. Look after one another.

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Your joy is infectious and your kind heart hard to ignore. You have friends aplenty and if you see someone being left out it is you who includes them. You are popular and you don’t realise it which makes you all the more endearing. When I pick you up from school you are always giggling with someone and this makes my heart smile. I’m pretty sure the most appealing part of school for you at the moment is the chance to see your friends. You tell me endless stories about the two Charlees and how much you adore them. If I was 8 again I know I’d be longing to be your friend.

To me you are perfect. Even on the days we are mad at each other, and I know there will be plenty more of these over the coming years but I never want you to forget that. To me you are perfect. I promise to grow with you as I always have. You are my first born, the lessons we are learning we are learning together. You are my teacher as much as I am yours. I promise you that no matter what the years throw at us I will always love you. My love for you will never falter. My love for you is everlasting.

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Happy Birthday my Darling Miss.

Love Mum x